A Letter to my Thirteen Year Old Daughter

Before my children were born, I decided to write a letter to them when I was pregnant, one when they were born, and one every year thereafter on their birthday. Given the concerns over premature labor this week and last, I decided it might be a good idea to write Baby Girl's letter now.

To my darling daughter:

What do I hope for you, my 13 year old daughter?

I hope you are strong enough to define yourself. I hope that your father and I have given you the skills you need to be able to do so as your enter the upcoming, turbulent teenage years. And I hope you realize that it is not only okay for you to change who you are, it is expected! I hope that the changes you make are the ones you want, though, and not the ones your friends want.

I hope you realize that as you enter into this wonderful and confusing aspect of womanhood, you are going to "trip and fall." And I hope you know that, even though it will kill me inside, sometimes I am going to have to let you fall. And I especially hope that your father and I have taught you how to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on.

I hope I can see you for who you are, and who you want to be, rather than who I want you to be. And if you think I'm failing in that aspect of motherhood, I hope that we have the type of relationship where you can tell me.

I hope you have beauty. Not outer beauty (that is overrated or can be bought), but the type of beauty that emanates from within, that only those who are truly kind and caring possess.

I hope that when your brother and sister try to push you around, you fight back. (No bloodshed, please.)

I hope that you can smile in the face of difficulties, right before you dig in and finish the job.

I hope you know that even though you are my third child, you are just as special and loved as the first two are.

What do I wish for you, my beautiful 13 year old daughter?

I wish you intelligence - not just the kind that comes from books, but also the type of intelligence that comes from your experiences, if you are brave enough to learn from them.

I wish you fairy tales and happy endings.

I wish you struggles so you learn what is really important.

I wish you tears so you know how to treasure true happiness.

I wish you a love that will make you smile every day.

I wish you only enough goodbyes to make you appreciate your hellos.

I wish you the life you want.

I hope and pray and wish you enough.

I hope you know you can come talk to me about anything.

I love you,
Mom