Husband-isms

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Me: "I'm sorry that this pregnancy is making me crazier than normal."
Hubs: "I'm sorry I'm not putting up with your bullsh@# anymore."

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Hubs: "I don't care who gets the damn balloon!  Just fight about it silently!"

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Hubs (at 2 in the morning to me): "The boy is calling you."
Boyo (from down the hall): "No, I NOT!  I CALLING DADDY!"
Hubs (to me): "And you are SURE he's mine?"

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Feeling the baby move the other day, my husband looked at me concerned: "What body part is that?" he asked.  "Her horns?" 

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"Do you ever feel like the intelligence level for this country has been set to easy?"

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Our AC broke.  During a day that was 104 FREAKING degrees out.  I was a little pissed to say the least.

I asked my husband what the hell we were planning, getting pregnant when I would be at my most pregnant during the hottest part of the year.

My husband laughed in my face: "What plan?!!"  

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Every morning my husband irons his shirt before work. The sound of the ironing board always wakes me up, which is really irritating.  When I mentioned this to my husband, he replied with, "Well, you could do the ironing during the day...."

I'm still laughing at him.