Before my children were born, I decided to write letters to them that they could open on their birthdays. Since I figured they would not be able to read when they were born, I addressed the letters with instructions to be opened starting on their 13th birthday. I wrote a letter when I was pregnant, a letter on the day the baby was born, and I write a letter every year on their birthday. My daughter's third birthday was two weeks ago, so she gets to open this when she is 17...
My Darling, Preciousest Baby Girl:
You are such a BIG girl. I know that you are 17 now, and I can't wait to meet the adult you are becoming, but right now you are my precious little 3 year old daughter who likes to tuck in her baby dolls and pet my hair, who loves to cuddle on my lap while watching Princess movies and who takes my hand with a "Come ON Mommy" while you drag me over to come color or play with you, and who demands "Too-Ra-Loo-Ra-Loo-La" and "Baby Mine" lullabies every night and throws a fit if I try to sing them out of order.
You are the most interesting little person. You are kind to your brother - mostly - and so talkative. You are also such a little ham with a big, infectious giggle. You can be a little shy at first, but once you warm up to a person or situation, look out! You are so friendly and loving! I worry that you are too friendly sometimes, that you might get hurt because you are so open and willing to be friends with people, but then I remember how painfully shy I was and realize that your way is better. You are also a bit of a bossy, stubborn little thing. Some people might think that is bad, but I think it's a good thing. Women in this world need to be a little bossy and stubborn; we need to be the leaders future generations can count on. So be bossy and stubborn -- it shows that you know your own mind and are not afraid to speak up. But please temper these qualities with the ability to think and compromise. Don't order people around just because you can and don't hang on to a belief/practice that you know is wrong. It's okay to change your mind once you get more facts.
I start to cry when I think of you reading this letter in 14 years... you are my little girl and I don't want you to grow up; I love you so much and the thought of losing this little girl actually causes me physical pain. But I know that I will love the kindergartner just as much, if not more, and the elementary age sweet girl just as much, if not more, and my preteen and teenager daughter just as much, if not more, as I love my 3 year old baby girl. And I can't wait to see what the future brings.
If I am doing my math right, you are going to be entering your senior year of high school this year. And I remember well how hard that year is -- not necessarily in terms of schooling, but in terms of standing at the cusp of adulthood; you are no longer a child but are not quite an adult yet either. I know that to you, my 17 year old daughter, I may seem overbearing and demanding, probably uncool and difficult. Try to understand that it is because I love you and I can't bear to let you go just yet.
What do I hope for you, my 17 year old daughter? I hope that you are not afraid to speak your mind. That you continue to be kind and friendly. That you are strong in spirit and self. That you still have an infectious giggle and are loving. I hope you have style and grace. And I hope you kick ass when needs be, but are not afraid to let others take the reins now and again. I hope you know how to relax and how to study, that you can have fun and be responsible, that you can be smart and silly, that you can be strong and gentle. I hope you know that you can come talk to me about anything and that you and I have a good relationship of love and trust. Mostly, I hope you know that I am proud of you and that I love you so so so so much.
I love you, my preciousest babiest girl,
Mom
No comments:
Post a Comment