I thought I was raising children...
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Monday, May 28, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Boyo-isms
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After he ran into the street the other day, I ran after him and swatted his bottom. He glared up at me and ordered me to: "No hit! Use your words!!"
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After telling him he could not have a push pop before dinner, he glared at me and said, "I no like that! I kick your butt!"
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Defending his sister, Boyo ran to get his foam sword to stop me from giving the baby her antibiotics. "You no give her medicine," he shouted, "or I stick you!"
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Monday, May 21, 2012
Girlie-isms
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At Target the other day, Girlie saw a very large (I'm trying to be polite here, but he was morbidly obese) man in a wheelchair. Without missing a beat, she went up to him and said, "You are a BIG man!"
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I asked her what letter she was learning at school... she told me that she didn't know, but "if you give me your phone, I'll text my teacher to ask her."
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I showed the kiddos how to make rainbows when we were watering the plants the other day. She watched for a minute and then said, "That sure is a beauty!"
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Girlie asked my sister how hold she was. When her aunt told her she was 30, Girlie responded with, "So on your next birthday you will be 31. And on your very last birthday, you will be 32."
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I lost track of my days and asked the kiddos if it was Tuesday or Wednesday. Girlie responded, "April."
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At Target the other day, she asked for a toy for Christmas. I said okay, but told her that her birthday was coming up before Christmas. She looked at me with wide eyes and whispered, "You mean it's been a whole year?"
Friday, May 18, 2012
Please. Please consider signing.
I read this article the other day about how moms are fighting with each other over stupid, stupid s#$t like attachment parenting versus ferberizing, breastfeeding versus formula, stay at home moms versus working mom.... and I started to cry.
Why did I start to cry? Because this issue has been near and dear to my heart for about four years, 11 months, and 3 days -- or since my eldest daughter was born. I've been screaming from the rooftops (sometimes literarlly) about how there is a war on moms in this country. I have read the book War on Moms. I have blogged about it here. I have written my Congressperson and Senators about it monthly -- to the point that they don't really respond anymore.
Why do I care so much? Because being a mother is hard enough.
But when you add in stress about bonding with my child, paying for the mortgage/food/insurance/gas/diapers when I'm on leave, getting enough sleep, taking care of new tiny, helpless person -- AND YOURSELF --and remembering that I have a husband who needs me too, it's enough to make motherhood seem f$%#ing impossible.
But that's not all. Why else do I care?
Because it sucks that I had to go back to work 2 weeks after I had #3, but everyone told me "That's okay, you work from home." Really?!?! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou for that. Do you have ANY idea how easy it is to work from home? I didn't think so.
Because when my employer found out that I'm pregnant, they told me that they don't cover health insurance while I'm on maternity leave. But they will float me and I can pay them back with further deductions from my meager paycheck -- at interest.
Because when my son had RSV and was in the hospital at 5 weeks old, I had to go back to work 2 weeks after he got home from PICU. And that was after my pediatrician said he shouldn't be in daycare until he was 3 months old. Do the math... 8 weeks old when I had to go back to work. No daycare until they are 3 months old... that's at 12 weeks. What was I going to do for those 4 weeks? If it wasn't for my sister in law, I would have had to quit.
Because it sucks that when my friend found out she was pregnant, her hours got slashed to part time so that her insurance wasn't covered.
Because it sucks that my sister was just told she is not covered by FMLA.
Because I have heard countless studies of my friends having to pump in the bathroom at work.
Because when my working mom friends tell me how hard it is to leave their six week old baby with a nanny/daycare/family member, my heart breaks for them. Because I've done that too.
Because study after study, doctor after doctor, and common f#$%ing sense tells us that babies thrive when their mother is with them for at least 6 months.
So I read the article and I cried. Because someone else gets it. And isn't afraid to talk about it.
And then I signed the petition. Won't you sign it too?
Please, I'm not asking for a free pass or free money. I'm asking for money that I pay into social security and unemployment be given back to me -- even at 60%. I don't want my employer to have to pay me while I'm gone. But I would like to know that they will hold my job until my child is at least 6 months old.
Because just because it's always been this way, doesn't mean it has to continue.
Because just because it's always been this way, doesn't mean it has to continue.
Because it's hard enough to be a parent.
Please.
___________________________________________________________________________________
Greetings,
I just signed the following petition addressed to: U.S. Congress.
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We the undersigned call on the United States Congress to enact universal, paid, maternity leave for all new mothers.
The Family and Medical Leave Act does not help families who cannot afford to miss a paycheck. Some women have complications during pregnancy that mean they use up FMLA leave before the baby is born. Other women suffer from post-natal depression or other issues that mean they need longer to recover. And all women deserve the right to spend quality time with their new babies without worrying about financial pressures. Studies show that babies benefit from the dedicated care of parents in the first few months of life. The World Health Organization says that babies should be exclusively breastfed for the first six months of life, but many mothers who choose to breastfeed are unable to keep going once they start back at work. The US lags behind the rest of the developed world in providing maternity leave. This is not just a woman's right but a children's right and a human right - all mothers should have the right to paid maternity leave for each pregnancy, no matter where they work.
We understand that any new social legislation is difficult to propose, let alone enact. Nevertheless, it is our fervent hope that one or more Congressmen/Congresswomen will draft legislation that provides for more humane maternity leave for American women. As a society we say that we value mothers and children, so let's prove it by enacting a fair and universal, paid, maternity leave policy.
----------------
Sincerely,
[Your name]
I just signed the following petition addressed to: U.S. Congress.
----------------
We the undersigned call on the United States Congress to enact universal, paid, maternity leave for all new mothers.
The Family and Medical Leave Act does not help families who cannot afford to miss a paycheck. Some women have complications during pregnancy that mean they use up FMLA leave before the baby is born. Other women suffer from post-natal depression or other issues that mean they need longer to recover. And all women deserve the right to spend quality time with their new babies without worrying about financial pressures. Studies show that babies benefit from the dedicated care of parents in the first few months of life. The World Health Organization says that babies should be exclusively breastfed for the first six months of life, but many mothers who choose to breastfeed are unable to keep going once they start back at work. The US lags behind the rest of the developed world in providing maternity leave. This is not just a woman's right but a children's right and a human right - all mothers should have the right to paid maternity leave for each pregnancy, no matter where they work.
We understand that any new social legislation is difficult to propose, let alone enact. Nevertheless, it is our fervent hope that one or more Congressmen/Congresswomen will draft legislation that provides for more humane maternity leave for American women. As a society we say that we value mothers and children, so let's prove it by enacting a fair and universal, paid, maternity leave policy.
----------------
Sincerely,
[Your name]
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Monday, May 14, 2012
I want to put this on a business card...
"Being a Mom means being a chef, a nurse, a stylist, a guard, a driver, a waitress, an alarm clock, a guide, a banker, a teacher, a hairdresser, a dentist, an instructor, a climbing frame, an armchair, a best friend, a worst enemy, an entertainer, a provider, a defender, a protector, a care giver, a motivator, an actress, a tester, an officer, an enforcer, a ruler, a photographer, a hostess, a sp...eech therapist, a slave, a referee, a spy, a translator, a spoilsport, a sportsman, a cleaner, a musiction, a money maker, a trouble stopper, a story teller, a playmate, an audience, a judge, an investigator, a fortune teller, a discipliner, a home maker, a cake baker, a craftsman, a genious, a helping hand, a rock, a whole support system and that's as well as chasing the boogey man away, having the healing kiss of bumps and bruises and having eyes in the back of my head and a million pairs of hands. These are all the things I am, every day to my kids and on special days I am also the Easter Bunny, the tooth fairy and Santa Claus too." - Twenty Something Mum
Sunday, May 13, 2012
You Will Simply Call Her 'Mom'
I wish I could take credit for this, but try as I might, I couldn't find the author........
"A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"
"Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you."
The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy."
God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."
Again the child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?"
God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak."
"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"
God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray."
"Who will protect me?"
God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking it's life."
"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you."
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name."
"You will simply call her, 'Mom.'" - Unknown
"A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"
"Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you."
The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy."
God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."
Again the child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?"
God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak."
"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"
God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray."
"Who will protect me?"
God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking it's life."
"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you."
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name."
"You will simply call her, 'Mom.'" - Unknown
Friday, May 11, 2012
I am not a crazy person. I swear.
Dear Everyone at the Brea Farmer's Market on Tuesday at 4:13 pm:
I am sorry for frightening you. I did see some of the looks as I ran past, screaming "Red light, red light, red light" at the top of my lungs while pushing a baby in a stroller and dragging a four year old behind me.
To explain, I was chasing my son, who was headed straight into oncoming traffic. And "red light" is our code for STOP RIGHT NOW OR YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY!
Perhaps I should have been shouting STOP RIGHT NOW OR YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY! Perhaps that would have terrified you less. You may have chuckled and gone about your day. Perhaps one of you would have caught the 47 pound blur that is my son. And I'm fairly certain that if I had been shouting STOP RIGHT NOW OR YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY, about half of you would have come up to me to tell me that
A. It gets easier.
B. I should spank him.
C. I have my hands full; or,
D. I'm a horrible mother and you are calling Child Protective Services. Right now.
I just wanted you to know that I am not a crazy person who habitually runs around screaming "RED LIGHT" at the top of her lungs. I only do it about once a day. But you see, there is a reason I do it. I have a three year old who is determined to kill himself.
Don't get me wrong; if I was a crazy person, I would probably still run around screaming "Red light." But I wouldn't have an acceptable excuse.
Kindly,
Shannon
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
What An "Annibersarry" Is...
My parents' 33rd wedding anniversary was on Saturday. I thought it would be cute to get the kiddos to tell me what they thought being married, in love, and/or celebrating an "annibersarry" meant -- I would copy it down and send it to my parents.
Girlie, after thinking for some time, said: "Being in love means eating dinner together and loving each other and using good manners. Being married means you live together! And to celebrate an "annibersary" you have a party with Mickey and Minnie and Jake and a cake and cupcakes and juice boxes and pizza. Oh, and you don't make fart noises at each other. And being love means your prince comes and then you go to college and become a "Supeme Cut Justice" and you have babies and sometimes you kiss."
Boyo, playing Angry Birds on my phone, looked up and said, "You don't shoot people."
Awesome.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
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