Moms Need To Stand Together

~
I was feeding Baby Girl at the park this weekend when a little boy (about 5, I would guess) walked by with his mom.

"What's she doing under that blanket, Mom?" he asked.

"She's feeding her baby. Let's give her privacy, okay?"

"Why is she feeding her baby like that?"

"Because she's a good mommy," the mom replied. I smiled at her, grateful that she wasn't going to give me crap for breastfeeding in public.

"Did you feed me like that?" the little boy asked.

"No, honey, I gave you a bottle," the mom said. There was a little bit of sadness as she said it, and she looked away, as if she was afraid I would judge her.

"Why didn't you feed me like that?" the little boy asked, pointing to me. (God, kids are tenacious, aren't they?)

"Well," the mom began, but she was clearly at a loss for what to say. After all, she had just said that I was a good mommy for breastfeeding. The implication, that was not lost on her son, was that she was not.

"Hey, Buddy," I called over to the boy. I didn't care that they would know I was eavesdropping. "Your mommy feed you with a bottle because she is a good mommy too."

"Okay," the boy said and his mom and I shared a smile, both relieved to have our "good mommy-hoods" reaffirmed.

I was just glad I could return the favor to her.

Raising A Boy Takes Some Getting Used To... Part II

~

I never would have guessed that I would have to utter the phrase:

"We do NOT stab your sister! Put the knife down!"

It was a toddler butter knife, but still... It was principle of the thing.

Sometimes I feel like a hostage negotiator.

Wordless Wednesday

Soccer Girlie

Four year old soccer is the funniest thing I've ever seen. I don't think I've laughed this hard since the last time I was at a comedy club.

From my daughter's awesome pink shin guards and pink heart soccer cleats...




... to refusing to be a Cheetah like the rest of her team (she's a "cheetah butterfly") ...



... to worrying about her hair as she is scoring goals...

... to arguing with her coach about whether or not she can use her hands (she can throw it further than she can kick it, she says, because her hands are stronger than her feet)


... to scoring a goal and declaring herself done (and then sitting on the ball so no one else can play)...


to refusing to shoot a goal when she had an open shot and the coach was yelling, "Shoot! Shoot! It's your ball!" because: "That's not my ball! My ball has my name on it!"



... I just can't get enough!

Wordless Wednesday: How my son watches Star Wars

Raising A Boy Takes Some Getting Used To...

...
Why, you ask?

My son wanted to watch Star Wars. Okay, that I get.

He wanted his light saber too. Okay, this also makes sense.

He pointed to the robots/clones/drones/whatever the hell they are and shouted, "Bad Guys!" Again, makes perfect sense.

Then he slammed his light saber into the TV screen and yelled, "I fight da robots!"

That I don't get.

However, it made perfect sense to my husband.

T-Ball!

My son hit his first homerun at T-ball yesterday.


The ball traveled about 3 feet.


Seeing how he plays with 2.5 year olds, though, he had plenty of time to run the bases.


However, when he got to home plate, he wasn't quite sure what to do.


After all, Daddy was yelling, "Touch home plate! Touch home plate!"

And that is exactly what Boyo did.

Truly, 2 am is not my finest hour.

~
I didn't really breastfeed my older two kids.

I realize that the Breastfeeding Gestapo will gasp in horror at this and may try to hunt me down. Fine.

I realized something when I tried to breastfeed my daughter. Newborns eat about every two hours. Even at night.

Game over.

If I do not get at least six hours of sleep straight, I turn into Medusa. And even with 6 hours, I will still exhibit Medusa like qualities. Just not the head full of snakes.

So I admitted with my daughter that I was entirely too selfish, and after two weeks she got formula.

With my son, I was able to breastfeed him during the day. He got a bottle of formula at night. My husband fed him.

But with Baby Girl, I really wanted to breastfeed. Plus, you know, we don't have the money for formula. So I sucked it up.

Is it easy? Let's just say it's getting easier. But the one thing that makes it really easy? I WILL NOT FEED HER BETWEEN 12 AM and 5 AM. (Take that, Breastfeeding Gestapo!)

Please do not call the police. I'm not letting her scream hungrily in her bassinet. If she wakes up during that time period, she gets a bottle of breast milk. And my husband has to feed it to her, because I don't want to create nipple confusion. (At least, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.)

This plan has been mostly working. Except for the other night.

I fed the baby at 11 pm. I put her in the bassinet. My husband had fallen asleep earlier, so I shook him awake and told him that he was in charge of the baby.

Then I did the dishes, picked up the living room, and went to bed around 11:30.

Boyo woke up at 12. "I haf a bad dweam, Mom," he told me pitifully when I stumbled into his room.

I sympathized and soothed, tucked him back in, and returned to bed.

At 1 am, I woke up to Baby Girl screaming her head off in the bassinet. I lightly tapped my husband. "Baby needs you," I told him. "The bottle's on the nightstand."

He sat up, scooped up the baby, and held her right next to my head where she continued to scream. He did not give her a bottle. He did not change her. He rocked her and said, "Shhhhhhhhhhh," for about 30 minutes.

At this point, I was imagining punching my husband. So instead I snatched the baby from him and began to breastfeed her.

My husband laid back down and went to sleep. The phrase "I saw red," doesn't even begin to cover it.

I lost my mind. "Are you awake?" I snarled. He snored. "WAKE UP!" He snored again.

I punched him in the shoulder. He startled awake. Just to be sure he was awake though, I punched him again. "WHAT?" he snapped. "I'm awake! You didn't have to punch me!"

"You should be thankful all I did was punch you!" I snapped back. "Did you hear ANYTHING I told you tonight?"

"No, but I'm awake now. What do you need?"

I sputtered in anger. Baby Girl began to fuss again. I thrust the baby at him. "She's done eating. Burp her. Take her into the living room. Put her in her swing. Here's a bottle. Now get the f#@% out of here so I can go to sleep!!"

He sleepily took the baby and left. I laid down and seethed, thinking murderous thoughts, but then I realized that I would have 3 kids to raise by myself. (I'm joking! I love my husband even when I hate him, to quote Crazy Stupid Love. It's just hard to remember that at 2 in the morning.)

And 30 minutes after he left? Girlie climbed into bed with me and proceeded to kick me for 3 hours in her sleep.

I'm beginning to think sleep is for the weak.

Family Fun Day

~
We had a great day yesterday. We went to breakfast, hiked around the Arboretum, and then went and saw Kung Fu Panda 2.

I learned a lot yesterday.

Such as:

1. Having a bag full of "restaurant only" activities is brilliant. I stole the idea from a friend of mine. And now my kids play quietly at the table and my husband and I can have a (gasp!) grown up conversation.

2. My son can put away three bowls of Fruit Loops, 3 pancakes, and 5 slices of bacon at Hometown Buffet.

3. When hiking around the Arboretum, look up. That is where the butterflies dance, according to Girlie.

4. Boyo will roll down a dirt hill then bounce up, declaring, "I faw! I go ka-boom!" Then he will run away.

5. After he does that, he will let off a cloud of dust any time he moves or is touched. He truly is Pig Pen.

6. My son has an unholy fear of tree roots.

7. Boyo is not old enough to sit through a movie that is longer than 65 minutes.

8. A tube of mini MnM's will last for 65 minutes.

9. A newborn will sleep through all of this.

I'm Recycling....

1. Accept the fact that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue!
2. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
3. Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
4. Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.
5. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
6. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
7. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
8. Never buy a car you can't push.
9. Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
10. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
11. Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
12. The second mouse gets the cheese.
13. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
14. Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
15. You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
16. Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.
17. We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
18. A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

*Save the earth..... It's the only planet with chocolate !*

Wordless Wednesday

Baby K went to Disneyland for the first time!


She wasn't impressed.

Overheard at our house...

~
"Don't put me in the monkey cage Momma. Put me in the Monkey house." ~Boyo

"I have a froggy in my throat. You get a froggy in your throat and then you have a baby." ~Girlie (Is THAT how that works... No wonder my contraceptives haven't been working...)

"Is it Christmas?!" ~Girlie (after seeing her daddy go into the rafters to get more baby crap.

"Don't strangle me! Strangle my brother!" ~Girlie. (Where did she learn strangle?!?)

"Dog, you need a hobby." ~My husband, after tripping over the dog for the fourth time in 3 minutes.

"Have fun at the bachelor party. Remember - I don't mind strippers. I have a problem with hookers." ~Me, kissing my husband goodbye Saturday night.