Riddles

My daughter wants to tell me riddles all the time.... the problem is, she is the WORST riddler ever. 

For example:

"Mommy, guess what is green, has petals, and grows in the ground?"

"What?"

"A flower!"  

Or this happens:

"Mommy, guess what has a trunk and four legs?"

"What?"

*hysterical giggles* "I can't tell you!"

So I've tried to teacher her what a riddle is.  I've given her examples. 

Q: What has 4 legs but can't sit down?
A:  A table!

Nothing has stuck.  And then today I thought she finally got it.  I got this:

"Mommy, what is all around us but we can't see it?"

"Um, air."

I got the riddle right.  However, I was wrong about her getting how to tell riddles, because her response was the funniest answer I've ever heard: 

"MO-OM!  It's not fun if you get it right the first time!!"

Girlie-isms

~

"Mom, can you do this?" she asked as she curled her tongue.

"Yup, see?" I showed her.

"No, no, no.  You have to have spit in the middle of it."

~

After she got smacked in the face by her brother's light saber (which he swears was an accident), I asked her what would make it better.  She sniffed and then said, "New shoes."

~


"Mommy, can I have chicken steak for dinnner?"

"Uh... why?"

"Cuz it has protein.  And I need it."

"Why do you need protein?"  (don't panic, people without a sense of humor.  I know my kids need protein.  I wanted to see what she would say)

"So I can have long hair.  Like Rapunzel."

~

"So I have the little Merida with the blue dress and the little Merida with the green dress.  And I have the big Merida with blue dress.  I need the big Merida with the green dress."

"Kiddo, two questions.  Why do you need four Meridas?  And how did you get three Meridas?"

"Mom.  So they are evens.  And because I'm awesome."


~

"Daddy?  I love you."

Hubs: "I love you too kiddo."

"Daddy?"

Hubs: "Yes Kiddo?"

"I farted." 

~

"When you kiss someone, that makes them your husband.  And Joshua is my husband."

Me (trying to act nonchalant): "Oh?  Did Joshua kiss you at school today?"

"No.  I kissed him." 

Dear Lord.